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mamaape
08-27-2012, 02:41 PM
Just another reason why I love hanging out HERE, at GingerScraps, than at Mommy forums and blogs. It's just too insane. Sure we're all mothers, grandmothers, aunties and the like... but we don't sit and judge and say harsh things to one another re: our parenting choices. I'm sure we all have opinions, but at least we keep them to ourselves, or share them with RESPECT...unlike what I see in these other mommycentric forums, etc.

I am venting(?) due to seeing a link on Facebook to an article(about RF and FF your child), to which I read and then proceeded to read the comments- it's just... frustrating that there are so many "mommy wars". I mean, focus on your own life and not everyone else's! ARG!

Okay, done ranting, and thanks GingerScrappers for being such a great group! :)

:kisses

christinap
08-27-2012, 03:36 PM
I know what you mean! I take what they say with a grain of salt, you have to do what's best for your family.

charmedeebob
08-27-2012, 04:10 PM
Word. I can't stand the Mommy wars. Like, really, you want to be competitive about whether my kid is walking yet? Get a life! I don't "do" mommy boards anymore :)

Neverland Scraps
08-27-2012, 04:17 PM
well Im dumb, what does "rf" and "ff" mean?

and wow, you just totally made my decision about going to a baby board with this pregnancy. I was at one for several years, throughout my entire pgcy with my oldest (she's 11 now!) all the way through when my youngest was 2! I eventually stopped going because those online friends went on to having more kids and I wasn't having any luck getting pregnant. So I left and never looked back. That is until the other day when I thought how it was helpful to go through it back then when I was a first-time around mother. But then I weighed in the fact that my digi friends got me through deployment, a very bad broken leg and many other ups and down's, that I thought my digi friends would be a better choice.

But golly after reading your post, I am thinking I'll lean more towards my digi friends instead of going back to the baby board, because I'll be honest, I'm older now and wont put up with high school behavior and if that is what is there, Im not interested. At least here, we are all (mostly) mature! <3

mamaape
08-27-2012, 04:52 PM
RF: rear facing FF: front facing. In re: to car seats and at what age to turn a child. It's ridiculous, since every case, culture, child is different and there are these women who will say nasty little things, others not, but still... the amount of "crap" I see makes me glad I'm not a part of it. I'd be almost scared to join a mommy board, afraid to share my opinion (which I know does NOT coincide with many "granola" moms, etc.) so I am sticking to my digi friends, because they are best. ;) Plus, here we focus on how cute and awesome all our kids are, NOT about our parenting. :)

p.s. I do, of course, have RL mommy friends and I will talk and converse with them all the time about things, but online is just a breeding ground for attacking one's personal beliefs and feeling attacked. It doesn't help that moms are always so strong in their convictions, hehe. Some just need to learn not to be so overbearing.

While I was pregnant I would go and read articles, and forum posts and then the following comments/threads....and I felt more confused reading those because everyone tells you one way is wrong, the other is right, you're a bad mom if you do this, blah blah blah - I got over THAT real quick. Would read an article and make my own decision, opinion and move on.

conniep
08-27-2012, 06:58 PM
LOL I don't know why people drum up the drama or how they even have time for it! Ack, that's why I like it here too :) None of that silliness!

Sarah
08-27-2012, 07:06 PM
Instincts.
Best advice I got: listen to what others say and then go with what your gut says. Got that from quite a few parents that I really admire.
It's advice I follow now.

mamaape
08-27-2012, 07:27 PM
Yup. Same thing. I'll listen to what people have to say, but I'll make up my own mind, based on my beliefs, and "gut feelings" as to what's right for me and MY kid.

Instincts.
Best advice I got: listen to what others say and then go with what your gut says. Got that from quite a few parents that I really admire.
It's advice I follow now.

trina513
08-27-2012, 07:33 PM
AMEN SISTER ;) LOL! Love it - one reason that GS is considered the friendliest place in digiland - we're all ADULT enough to keep our mouths shut ;) LOL!

Neverland Scraps
08-27-2012, 08:24 PM
RF: rear facing FF: front facing. In re: to car seats and at what age to turn a child. It's ridiculous, since every case, culture, child is different and there are these women who will say nasty little things, others not, but still... the amount of "crap" I see makes me glad I'm not a part of it. I'd be almost scared to join a mommy board, afraid to share my opinion (which I know does NOT coincide with many "granola" moms, etc.) so I am sticking to my digi friends, because they are best. ;) Plus, here we focus on how cute and awesome all our kids are, NOT about our parenting. :)

p.s. I do, of course, have RL mommy friends and I will talk and converse with them all the time about things, but online is just a breeding ground for attacking one's personal beliefs and feeling attacked. It doesn't help that moms are always so strong in their convictions, hehe. Some just need to learn not to be so overbearing.

While I was pregnant I would go and read articles, and forum posts and then the following comments/threads....and I felt more confused reading those because everyone tells you one way is wrong, the other is right, you're a bad mom if you do this, blah blah blah - I got over THAT real quick. Would read an article and make my own decision, opinion and move on.

Oh I got it now on the rf and ff....yeah this past month, I got a mouthful on facebook about commenting about my daughter getting out of her booster chair when she turned 8, even though the law says 8 or so many pounds. Apparently my friend goes by the weight and was horrified that I'd dare take my daughter out of the booster. Needless to say, after a day or two of my dd being out of her booster, she cried about not being able to see out the window and still uses the booster seat. So yeah, was it really necessary for my friend to bash me on fb about it? No....I simpy deleted her comments and moved forward hehe


AMEN SISTER ;) LOL! Love it - one reason that GS is considered the friendliest place in digiland - we're all ADULT enough to keep our mouths shut ;) LOL!

And I dont think its a matter of us being adult enough to keep our mouths shut, I think its a matter of we respect each type of parenting skills and that's what makes the difference between the baby boards and digi! (Well some places in digi, I can't speak for them all!)

Sarah
08-27-2012, 09:41 PM
People.fraked out when we went from carrier to carseat, Madi was forward facing. She was 20lb and over a year. Plus, single cab truck. Only way to see until we got the SUV from my folks. A grand total of two weeks she was like that.
Then forward in the SUV because the seat fit better and more securely. E was forward at a year, but way past 20lb.
I get weird looks when I mention my 9-year-old and 7-year-old are still in boosters. Neither are at 50lb yet, and I'd like to wait until that, at the minimum.

kl.winters
08-27-2012, 11:53 PM
The very same reason I now stay away from the digi smack blogs, I couldn't handle all the negativity and bashing that goes on! It's ridiculous how cut throat some women can be.

prettyingreen
08-28-2012, 01:13 AM
thats why i stopped going to one of those sites, too much drama..... and at that time i had found Ginger Scraps :D

Colleen
08-28-2012, 02:43 AM
Oh my gosh - I despise those forums. I get having opinions and expressing them, but it can be done kindly in a way to give advice if it is being asked.

There are quite a few military forums like that, and it's sad. There are women looking for help and advice with living in the military or dealing with a move or what to expect on a deployment, and there are so many women on those sites that are just downright mean.

We are all moms - we should be banding together to survive motherhood! ;) teehee

StarWarsFans
08-28-2012, 10:41 PM
The same things used to happen on the adoption forum I was part of. So, I added my closest friends there to FB and we all said addios to the drama. I don't miss it at all!

Sent from my VM670 using Forum Runner

christinap
08-29-2012, 05:07 PM
My nearly 9 year old is still in a booster, he's out of it once in a while when he's in Grandma's car (which isn't very often). I'm in a couple of local groups on Facebook and some people just beat up others!

Hildur
08-30-2012, 09:43 PM
I hear you girls! I was on a mommy forum when I was pg with DS and then up until few months after DD was born. And the bashing that can go on about anything wether it is about milestones, breat feed / formula feeding or car seats. Or just any other matter.

The fact remains in regards to car seats is that it all varies by the child. For instance DS was just under 9 months when we moved him out of the infant car seat because he was getting way to big for it and far to heavy. While DD was 15 months when we moved out of the infant car seat just because she was a wee little thing and she even still had leg room in that chair. We just moved her out from her car seat - she's now 4 - to a booster seat while my friends son who is 15 months younger than she is moved to a booster seat a month before her just because he is both larger and heavier than she is. For my son who is just about to turn 7, he is still in his booster seat. We have one booster without the back in hubby's car which he'll sit on from time to time but her actually prefers the back as much as he used to complain about it. He on the other hand has now reached 26 kgs / 57 lbs but he is far from being removed from the booster seat or just the booster.

This just is the same as about education, we need to view each student as an individual instead as a part of the whole.

waterlily_mc
09-06-2012, 04:59 AM
All the drama makes us Mother's feel so alone - when actually we are all going through the same struggles/frustrations/questions in raising children. If everyone could pull together we wouldn't have to feel like we are standing alone.

NotAVampireLvr
09-12-2012, 06:58 PM
you know I had this very conversation with my husband the other night. Other than the smallish forum I've been frequenting over the last few years, most of the mommy boards I've been too have turned me off at some point or another and I've moved in. I haven't really seen as much of that in the digi scrap community.

msbrad
09-13-2012, 03:36 AM
Oh dear- I think I am late for this topic... I've zero clue on mommy forums.
Since I am a grandma, a mama , a teacher, a wife and a friend... I suggest staying with digi!
m

yabby
09-13-2012, 07:56 PM
Even homeschool forums are like that...you should unschool, or use this curriculum, or avoid that one. I thought homeschoolers would be different because we were all trying to do what was best for our child that didn't fit the public school option. BUT I was so wrong, I don't even visit those forums anymore.